I wrote this during a family reunion, with all of the cousins were present.  I always seem to have some difficulties when we get together, but I love the times we do that and always have fond memories of the reunion times together, despite my heart hurting at times.

Excitement, plans
renting a house.
We are all getting
together!
Even the nieces and
nephews,
for hiking & nice meals,
volleyball games cheered
on by relatives and
“Como Piedro” sessions
& college advise for the
young ones.
Love, competition,
and birth order.
Making my Mom happy
trying to be the
favored child of the
moment.  Cute towns
and shopping,
cousins off and bonding on
San Francisco trips-
their own private reunion.
Parks, artists
galleries, and finding
a good inexpensive
meal out, some good music,
good wine and to reconnect
& make that early bond
unbreakable and renewed.  The bond
where the cousins couldn’t wait
to see each other-
a little heaven on earth for a week
or two each year.
Those small children,
now adults, and now
no longer interested
in being in the pool,
diving under legs &
being thrown in a dive
by the Dads.  They are architects
doctors, spiritual center
managers, college students &
data analysts at Pinterest.  Grown up
and flown yet their connection
is solid.
I still have my sensitivities
when I am with my brother and sister.
Being the third, even at
60 I still feel left out by them.
But that is not
what is important, it
is the bond, the connection.
The crazy grading of
how we did as parents,
are we good parents?
We hope like our parents
we did our best with what
we had on our plates.
Remembering, old times, trends,
duck, playhouses, dad puttering
around in the yard and kitchen
and mom studying away.
We have incredible pride in our
children, each on their own,
path,-just being with each
other and keep on
building and connecting
and maybe one reunion
I can just sit down
& listen & enjoy,
none of the difficult
feelings will come up,
the competitiveness left
at the door, a thing of the past.
Just look at my brother,
sisters and my Mom and
feel love and a desire to just
enjoy the moment of being
with them, remembering,
laughing and sometimes even
crying a bit.

4-16-2017  Jewel Roberts